This is the first entry in my daily journal that I will now be keeping. The whole point of this is to jot down what I did or what I'm thinking or where I am each day just so I have some kind of record of who the fuck I was for all these years. It will probably be very boring and to no ones use but my own so if you happened to stumble across this I suggest you don't even bother. Today I made about $150 at work. I am on the possible verge of having a really ridiculous living situation because of saber-rattling and big ego's. The root of the problem is women and money. Interesting. Hopefully I will start to remember some grammar skills as well in this little thing here. Today I listened to Gaslight Anthem and Metallica (killemall.)
I work alot right now, pulling basically 6 days a week being a lame-ass manservant. ("Manservant" does not show up as a misspelled word. Interesting.) I was thinking about how I don't do anything 6 days a week other than work. If I was to be able to apply the same and/or energy (they don't have to be equal) to any other task or endeavor I would be able to excel at it. This isn't a "work sucks" tangent, just a realization that if I make myself do anything at 6 days a week I would be rewarded for it I think. 'Working too much' is not an excuse for it, I am a young, strong, free man and men like me have conquered their own lives for generations before me. There have always been hardships and obstacles in life. I am no different than those who have gone and fought for their lives before me.
I have just learned that I really loath the idea of capitalizing words in sentences in order to emphasize. That is very ANNOYING. Learning new things about yourself is always such a thrill. I think that knowing myself and conquering my own existence is more of a worthy challenge to get worked up about than owing money to faceless entities. Definitely confront that challenge, but don't give it the respect of being the one thing holding you back from greatness, you know its not that powerful a force to keep you down.
I toyed with the idea tonight of giving $20 bucks to a homeless guy when he asked for change. I have always wanted to put a boot in the face of panhandlers on the street but I'm willing to experiment with the opposite decision and see if it improves my moral outlook on things.
Reading: Invisible Monsters. No opinion on it yet. Main character is a women, we'll see how this goes.
Also, a little mini-bio on Henri Cartier-Bresson that's in the beginning of a book I bought of his. Strange guy, very shitty painter, who never saw himself as a photographer, he always thought of himself as a painter. Photography wasn't even something that excited him it seems like, he just did it because he couldn't paint. Fuckin French.
